"i want to write a song about her hips,
her hips and the way they fit perfectly in mouth spaces
and her lips, how they lace between fingertips
i want to write a song about this girl
and teach it to the world as a goddamn anthem"
-unknown

we can never break up?

i don't wanna be taken for granted. i want everything i am to be emphasized to the fullest extent.

thanks

thanks for fucking up our anniversary.

when you feel it in your gut

you made someone else fall in love with you? just to get back at them? grow the fuck up if you think i'm gonna believe that.

chasing the dragon

In American drug use slang, "chasing the dragon" refers to the elusive pursuit of the ultimate high in the usage of some particular drug. The term alludes to the feeling that the next ingested dosage of the drug will result in a nirvana that seems and feels imminent and conclusive, yet upon penultimate consumption never quite yields the promised experience - leading to the desire for the next dose that still promises the same - thus chasing the dragon but never catching it.

i keep wishing things will go back to those days when everything felt so amazing.
indescribable.
but it'll never happen again.
what i keep doing to myself is unhealthy.
for some reason i can't stop.
i'm stuck. i'm addicted.
he's like heroin.

no one should not be able to sleep due to someone else

a few nights ago before i'd fall asleep i would pray to give me a dream. in that dream would be what his true intentions are, what's really going on. otherwise i'm just left wondering all the time.

last night i dreamt about him. & someone else. i don't know what to think of this. maybe i just dreamt it because it's been in my head for a while. yet it's hard to think otherwise when right now it's about 3:30 in the morning and i still haven't heard from that beloved fucking boyfriend of mine.

he always has me worrying and stressing. all of my entries are about the bad that i've been feeling. lately it feels like it's been outweighing the good. what good is there? i can't feel it anymore.